


Daily Bugle Report: Fully Dressed

by d0d0bird



Series: Marvel: Tales to Tantalize! [14]
Category: Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Clothing, Embarrassment, F/F, Humiliation, Janet van Dyne cameo, Teasing, basically just an excuse to introduce clothing brands to these stories, fabric, wedgie, wedgies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:47:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21826171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d0d0bird/pseuds/d0d0bird
Summary: It’s The 14th Annual Northeastern Fashion Conference, presented by Van Dyne at the Alchemax Center!This special Daily Bugle live stream is hosted by Betty Brandt and Kat Farrell, who will comment on the various presentations and walk viewers through the different clothing brands and styles.
Relationships: Betty Brant/Kat Farrell
Series: Marvel: Tales to Tantalize! [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1507763
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Daily Bugle Report: Fully Dressed

“Hello everyone,” announced Betty, “and thank you for joining the Daily Bugle live stream here at The 14th Annual Northeastern Fashion Conference! I’m Betty Brant.”

“And I’m Kat Farrell,” added her redheaded cohost, “Anticipation is high here at the Alchemax Center as everyone prepares for the first presentation, which will be starting in just a few minutes.”

Kat Farrell and Betty Brant sat side by side at a small desk that had been set up with a laptop and a webcam. They were in a hall designated specifically for press, separate from the presentation room. Journalists from the New York Bulletin, the Daily Globe, and others were seated nearby either liveblogging or live streaming as well. They had all been given exclusive access to live footage of the presentations, but were only allowed to stream their own commentary.

Betty Brant was wearing a blue pinstripe pantsuit with a sharp, matching vest. Kat wore a black pencil skirt with a matching black jacket and white blouse. Kat wore square thick-rimmed glasses and dark lipstick as well, giving her a sharp look. Both journalists had been requested to dress more stylishly for this particular report.

“For those unfamiliar,” said Betty, “The Northeastern Fashion Conference is a fashion, style, and clothing conference held annually by Van Dyne, a subsidiary of the Northeastern Shipping Company.”

“The Northeastern Fashion Conference is the last of its kind,” continued Kat, “so this event is at the center of the industry. If a company’s going to unveil a new product or line of clothing, this is the place they do it.”

“Some say the Northeastern Shipping Company’s ruthless business tactics unfairly ran its competitors off the market,” explained Betty, “while others argue that Janet Van Dyne’s unique creative style and inclusive approach allowed her business to thrive while her rivals failed to adapt.”

“Regardless,” said Kat, a hint of annoyance in her voice as she eyed Betty, “few can argue that every major brand in the clothing industry is grateful for the opportunity this conference provides.”

“Earlier today Janet Van Dyne provided a press statement promising an excellent show,” said Betty, “All of the major brands will be presenting and she promises a surprise presentation as well!”

“Looks like the Ronnie’s presentation is beginning,” said Kat, “we’ll give you updates on the products being presented as the information becomes available to us.”

“Ronnie’s is a tried and true American brand that has withstood the test of time,” recited Betty, “Established in 1903 by a family of immigrants, the company remains strong today and boasts a reputation as an affordable and reliable brand for their customers.”

“The models are currently presenting the brand’s new casual line,” said Kat, watching the footage on her laptop, “The outfits emphasize the company’s new high rise jeans, promising to make any body type look good while complimenting colorful styles to go with it.”

“The appeal to multiple body types is noteworthy,” added Betty, “Until Van Dyne began using models of varying body types in their own runway shows, other clothing brands almost never-”

“Look!” said Kat suddenly, as if trying to change the subject, “Is that Millie Collins?”

“It sure is!” said Betty, “Millie the Model got her start modeling for Ronnie’s! It’s no surprise to see her working with them again this year.”

Millie was a well-known celebrity model, largely due to her close friendship with socialites and reality show stars like Hedy Wolfe and Patsy Walker.

“Next they’re bringing out their fitness line,” continued Betty a moment later, “Their tank tops and basketball shorts have always sold well to the young adult demographic thanks to their affordability, but now Ronnie’s is trying to sell the line for its style and personality as well. The new bright and bold color options are something to see!”

“Now here’s their formal line,” said Kat, “Ronnie’s doesn’t have a long history of selling formalwear, only having entered the market in the last decade or so. Still, their affordable prices and marketing as a hip, young look have assured the line’s success. This year they’re primarily promoting their breathable women’s slacks for both business and business casual occasions.”

“I don’t know about you,” smiled Betty, “but I’m definitely excited to check those slacks out once the price comes down.”

“Next they’re bringing out their swimwear,” said Kat, “This year they’re primarily promoting masculine cuts of trunks for women.”

“This is a huge step for Ronnie’s,” said Betty, “It wasn’t until recently that the company ceased their strictly gendered-”

“Last year they also premiered their line of MeFit bikinis,” interrupted Kat, “A widely well-received line of two-piece swimsuits that comfortably covered the rear and chest that don’t ride up or slide off while swimming.”

“But-” began Betty.

“Their outerwear line is out!” continued Kat, “This is interesting. One of their models is wearing a hoodie while the other is wearing a sweater. They’re presenting two very different styles: a casual fall look and a more reserved winter one.”

“Both are likely spin offs from their other lines’ success,” noted Betty, “the hoodie is similar to one from their fitness line and the sweater resembles one from their casual line.”

“True,” said Kat, “Given that Van Dyne is hosting the event, they get to choose the categories. Companies like Ronnie’s who have previously not advertised outerwear options have to adapt accordingly.”

“Here comes their underwear presentation,” said Betty, “This is where Ronnie’s really got their start. The models are showing off their comfort-fit briefs and form-fitting undershirts, both of which have been staples in Ronnie’s wardrobe for decades. As always, they’re available in just about every color you can think of.”

“They’re just standard cut briefs with a distinct waistband,” said Kat, “but I think it’s safe to say that when most people think of underwear, they think of Ronnie’s.”

“Maybe!” laughed Betty, “But let’s not forget, the other presenters have their own underwear lines to show off too!”

“And with that, the Ronnie’s presentation is over!” announced Kat, “We’ll be back shortly with the next presenter after a word from our sponsors.”

Kat clicked about on the laptop and paused the recording to shift the stream to the prerecorded advertisement. It would last for a minute or two before they had to resume the report. Kat glared at Betty.

“What?” asked Betty indignantly.

“Can you tone down the Woodward and Bernstein routine?” asked Kat irritably, “We’re at a fashion conference, for Christ’s sake. We’re not here to pick apart systemic sexism or economic ethics. We’re here to tell our viewers about all the pretty clothes.”

“I’m sorry,” scoffed Betty sarcastically, “I was under the impression that the Daily Bugle was a news organization, not an advertising firm.”

“And how do you think Jameson will take it if he finds out your little crusade costs this news organization its press clearance?” asked Kat angrily.

“He can take it however he likes,” said Betty plainly, “I’m going to get the important messages out there. If Jameson has a problem with that, he can fire me.”

“That’s all well and good,” sighed Kat, “but I’m not going to let you bring me down with you. So for the rest of the live stream, could you at least pretend like you value your job?”

“Kat-” began Betty, but stopped when she saw their advertisement was about to end.

“Welcome back!” smiled Kat, turning to the webcam, “For those of you just joining us, Ronnie’s has just finished their presentation here at the 14th Annual Northeastern Fashion Conference. Next up is Actionwear!”

“Actionwear is a Chicago-based company that specializes in fitness apparel,” said Betty, quickly reverting to her reporting mode, “Most will recognize their name from the multitude of celebrity athlete-endorsed advertising campaigns.”

“Look at that cute, sporty dress!” noted Kat, “It says this lavender outfit is made practical with the implementation of shorts sewn into the dress itself, preventing any unintended upskirts.”

“Actionwear has decided to forgo the formalwear portion of the presentation,” explained Betty, “but their swimwear line is promising. The form fitting, quick-drying gender neutral leotards are the same kind used in the Olympics. This year’s line seems to promise a slightly sharper and sexier look than past lines.”

“Actionwear’s primary line is of course their athleticwear,” said Kat, “and they’ve clearly put work into this year’s designs for the fitness presentation. The stretch-fit leggings and breathable tank tops now come in just about every color. Their yoga pants line is also getting a new style, one that promises a flattering look in addition to comfort!”

“Actionwear has a long history of athletic outerwear products,” explained Betty, “Their windbreakers and ski apparel are presenting right now and I have to say they do look very sharp.”

“Finally, they’re bringing out the underwear line,” said Kat, “If you’re familiar with their existing products, it won’t come as a surprise. They’re showing off compression shorts, athletic briefs, sports bras…”

“I have to say,” added Betty, “Actionwear’s underwear line is genuinely good. I swear by it.”

“Yeah?” grinned Kat, “You wear Action Undies, Betty?”

“Well, yeah,” shrugged Betty, “I’m in the field a lot and, well, you know how it goes… Constant ride up, the fabric getting stuck to your butt when it gets hot out…”

“Betty!” exclaimed Kat, almost scandalized.

“What?” said Betty, “All I’m saying it’s nice to have some underwear that’s actually convenient to wear with my job.”

“...are you wearing them right now?” asked Kat after a moment.

“Um, yes?” answered Betty hesitantly.

“Why don’t you go ahead and show us?” dared Kat with a grin.

Betty looked back in disbelief. So that’s how it was going to be.

“I’m not going to strip on camera,” said Betty, feigning laughter.

“You don’t have to,” said Kat immediately, “Just pull them up and show us.”

The two women stared at each other for a moment. Kat was making a strong power move. If Betty refused, Kat would continue to press the issue. If Betty wanted her to stop, she’d have to appease her now and end the matter quickly.

“Fine,” said Betty, standing up and disconnecting her mic pack, “One second…”

Betty took her mic pack and suit jacket and placed both on the desk next to the webcam. She was now standing with her head almost out of frame, rummaging around in the front of her pants. Finally, she pulled out the front of her white Actionwear briefs, tugging until they were at about her belly button. It stretched easily, moving where Betty pulled it with almost no resistance.

“See?” she said, “These are from last year’s line. Quick-dry, no ride-up…”

“No ride-up?” chuckled Kat, “Even now?”

“Well, yes,” said Betty, rolling her eyes, “Now that I’m giving myself a wedgie it is riding up a _bit_.”

“Can we see the back?”

Betty scowled but complied. She turned her butt to face the camera, lifted up the back of her vest, and pulled up the back of the waistband of the briefs until they were about a fifth of the way up her back. The “Actionwear” logo could be seen written across the waistband.

“Giving yourself a double wedgie for the live stream,” smiled Kat, “That’s commitment.”

“Yes, well,” muttered Betty, grimacing as she shoved her undies back into her slacks and tugged at her butt and crotch, “I like to consider myself a professional.”

“That concludes the Actionwear presentation,” said Kat as Betty put her mic pack back on behind her, “We’ll be right back with X-All’s presentation after a word from our sponsors.”

Kat clicked the button to pause the stream.

“I know you did that on purpose,” said Betty coldly as she returned to her seat.

“Did what?” smiled Kat innocently.

“Alright, you win this round,” conceded Betty, “I’ll tone it down a bit.”

“You better,” chuckled Kat, “because I just got you to give _yourself_ a wedgie.”

“You know, of course,” said Betty, “This means war.”

“...and we’re back!” said Kat suddenly, ending the advertisement to resume the stream.

“X-All is getting ready to present,” said Betty, “X-All is based out of Oregon. They’re a minimum profit, ethically run organization started by Abigail Celeste about a decade ago. They pride themselves on treating their employees well, providing clothing for all walks of life, and always prioritizing comfort.”

“Celeste has also made a name for herself as a mutant activist,” continued Kat, “The line is notably one of the few companies in America owned by an open mutant.”

“They’re bringing out their casualwear now,” said Betty, “These maxi dresses are very cute and if the press package is to be believed, soft and comfortable too. They appear available in muted, cool colors like navy blue and dark grey.”

“Their fitness line is atypical,” noted Kat, “Their focus is, again, on comfort and ethical production. The models are wearing mostly baggy sweatpants and hoodies. It’s a distinct look, but not one that fits the traditional mold.”

“The formal portion has only one model,” said Betty, “but she is wearing a gorgeous floor length gown. It’s been custom made by the designers working for X-All, a service they offer to everyone.”

“X-All is forgoing the swimwear category and going straight to outerwear,” said Kat, “Their sweaters and thermal clothing has been called some of the best in the industry, if you can afford it.”’

“X-All’s prices are indeed higher than the market average,” acknowledged Betty, “but it’s worth noting that as a result, the company has been rated among the best for environmental friendliness and treatment of their employees.”

“Betty…” said Kat quietly in annoyance.

“Finally, they’re bringing out their line of underwear,” said Betty, ignoring Kat, “Most will probably recognize the brand for their ‘Say good-bye to wedgies’ campaign, with their high waisted briefs having specially designed grips to prevent ride up.”

“Maybe you should have worn those today,” said Kat bluntly.

Betty offered a wry laugh, hoping to move on from the subject.

“For those of you just joining us,” smiled Kat into the camera, “earlier this evening Betty gave herself a super wedgie to show off her Actionwear undies.”

Betty’s face was turning pink as she furrowed her brow and clenched her fists.

“That’s it for X-All,” she blurted out, “The next presenter is brand new to the conference. Join us when we come back to see Sunset’s first Northeastern Fashion Conference presentation!”

Betty paused the stream.

“Just what the hell was that!?” she demanded angrily.

“What?” smiled Kat, “Bashful? I told you to tone it down.”

“Shut up! I know you’re doing this to spite me,” said Betty angrily, “and you’re going to regret it!”

“Ooh,” mocked Kat, “I’m sooo scared.”

Betty gritted her teeth in frustration as Kat brought the stream back online.

“And we’re back!” announced Kat, “Sunset is about to present their products.”

“This is going to be interesting,” said Betty, now composed, “Sunset is not primarily a fashion company, but a conglomerate of different business ventures. They started as a toiletry subscription service and slowly expanded their subscriptions to include food, games, underwear, and eventually other clothes.”

“Since they have limited clothing lines, Sunset is only participating in two categories this year,” explained Kat, “Fitness and underwear.”

“Their fitness line is relatively new,” said Betty, “They advertise monthly shipments of sweatbands and socks as well as infrequent sets of entire outfits to wear while working out.”

“You have to hand it to them,” said Kat, “It’s not easy to make tube socks look cute, but they’re doing it! The quirky prints they offer are almost as varied as their underwear line.”

“You’re referring to ‘Sundies,’” said Betty, unable to contain a smile while saying the words, “Sunset’s underwear subscription service. Yes, they offer a number of cute prints. My understanding is that they're very popular with younger crowds.”

“Oh yeah,” nodded Kat, “They advertise at colleges all the time. Today the models are showing off never before seen prints on their boyshort cut: rocket ships, question marks, music notes...”

“You know, Kat,” said Betty, “You never told us what underwear _you_ wear. You strike me as a Sundies type of gal.”

“What I wear is my business,” said Kat back coldly, “and trust me, you’ll never find out.”

“If you say so,” said Betty, “and with that, Sunset has concluded their presentation. We’ll be right back with the final presenter: Janet Van Dyne herself!”

“Nice try,” whispered Kat after she paused the stream, “but you’re not going to get me that easily.”

They sat there in silence waiting for the advertisement to end.

“I was right though, wasn’t I?” asked Betty, “You totally wear Sundies.”

“And we’re back!” declared Kat abruptly, “I hope you’re all ready for the next presentation, because it’s going to be a doozy!”

“Van Dyne is one of the most successful subsidiaries of Northeastern Shipping Company,” said Betty, “and certainly the most well-known. The brand’s recognition is largely credited to Janet Van Dyne herself, who broke the products down to six primary lines of clothing and created a unique brand for each of them while maintaining an overall consistent image.”

“Coming out right now are the models for their Swallowtail line,” explained Kat, “This line is their casualwear and prides itself on classy yet unique looks. We’re seeing a lot of jackets and gloves playing into this year’s outfits, all while maintaining a certain elegance to them.”

“They’re next line is their Monarch formalwear,” said Betty, “which strives to be on the cutting edge of fashion design by paving the way for its competitors. Their abnormally cut dresses and brightly colored suits manage to be both artistic and tasteful. This year is no exception. That is one heck of a ball gown.”

“Their fitness line is called Buckeye,” said Kat, “and lately we’ve been seeing heavy inspiration in this line from the superhero community. Haven’t we, Betty?”

“Absolutely,” agreed Betty, “Janet Van Dyne has always been an adamant supporter of superheroes and this line pays homage to that. You can see that she’s drawn inspirations from Spider-Man, Captain America, and even She-Hulk’s uniforms when designing these leggings and muscle shirts.”

“I have to admit,” said Kat, “California Sister is always the most interesting part of the Northeastern Fashion Conference for me.”

“You’re referring to Van Dyne’s swimwear line,” clarified Betty.

“Yes!” smiled Kat, “I mean I’d never wear them, they’re hardly practical, but Van Dyne always seems to use her swimwear to test out some of her wildest ideas. Remember the goose swimsuit from last year?”

“I do,” chuckled Betty, “but let’s try to focus on what they have for us this year. They’re actually pushing their new line of stylized full body wetsuits. Oh! Here comes their Red Admiral outerwear line!”

“They’re really going for a 1920s Hollywood look, huh?” noted Kat, “All that fur.”

“I believe it’s faux fur,” corrected Betty, “but yes.”

“I know this next and final presentation is what some people wait for all year,” laughed Kat, “Van Dyne’s underwear line: Viceroy!”

“Van Dyne sure has curated the reputation of offering the sexiest undies on the market,” said Betty, “Even their high waisted briefs and boxers are flattering and cute. Of course, it’s their lingerie that gets the most attention.”

“Alright, I’ll admit it,” sighed Kat, “You asked me earlier what I wear: I do in fact wear Viceroys.”

“Really?” asked Betty, trying to mask her disbelief, “Do you find them comfortable?”

“Yes,” said Kat, “just because it’s a thong doesn’t mean it has to be in your butt all day.”

The two women shared a chuckle. Betty was certain Kat was lying. There was no way that woman wore Viceroy underwear. She was a cute, fun undie girl for sure. Betty decided not to press the issue and instead made note of it for later.

“Oh?” said Kat, looking at the laptop, “It looks like Janet Van Dyne is making an announcement…”

The two women watched the screen closely. Then their eyes widened.

“Breaking news!” shouted Kat suddenly, “Janet Van Dyne has just announced that the surprise final presenter is none other than the Wakandan Embassy!”

“This comes as a shock to many amid Wakanda’s apparent reluctance to enter the global market,” said Betty, “but according to Van Dyne, they have decided to share their textile technology with other nations. Wakanda is decades, if not centuries, ahead of all other countries in the textile field. Them providing that technology to the world will completely change the industry.”

“Van Dyne is telling us to expect a slew of Wakandan entrepreneurs to start popping up,” said Kat, “Could this also mean Wakanda may change its traditionally stringent emigration policy?”

“Very possibly,” agreed Betty, “Stay tuned to the Daily Bugle, as we stay on top of this issue. For now, let’s take a look at what the embassy is presenting.”

“The casualwear is extremely distinct,” said Kat, “a unique blend of tradition and innovation.”

“Their formal line is very similar,” said Betty, “There’s a shine to the fabric that’s unique to it; I’ve never seen it on other clothing. And the colors!”

“I know,” nodded Kat, “breathtaking. Wow! Check out their fitness line!”

“It looks almost metallic,” said Betty, “but the presenter assures us it’s soft to the touch. It apparently provides slight impact and heat resistance to the wearer.”

“They’re not presenting a swimwear line,” said Kat, “Apparently the fitness line doubles as swimwear. Interesting.”

“The outerwear is something else,” said Betty, “While the casual and formal lines seemed to blend old and new styles, the outerwear seems entirely focused on tradition. The thick, fluffy fabric on those suits will apparently keep you warm even in the coldest mountains.”

“Huh,” said Kat, “They’re about to unveil their underwear line. I wonder what that will look like.”

“They’ve been emphasizing the unique quality of the fabric in each category,” explained Betty, “It’s grown only in Wakanda and possesses special properties due to exposure to Vibranium during its growth. The fabric is self-healing, repairing stretches and tears within hours of sustaining them and effectively lasting forever.”

“That seems to be the selling point of their underwear,” noted Kat, “because other than that it looks very similar to X-All’s line.”

“Still,” said Betty, “Clothes that last forever and can’t be ruined? That’s going to turn the industry upside down.”

“Van Dyne wasn’t kidding when she said there’d be a surprise tonight,” noted Kat, “This is the takeaway everyone will be talking about tomorrow.”

“I’m sure,” agreed Betty.

“Anyway,” said Kat, turning to the camera, “That concludes our live stream from the Northeastern Fashion Conference. Be sure to join us- Hey! Betty! What are you doing?!”

Betty had gotten up and rushed behind Kat, where she had begun frantically working her way past every layer of clothing to get a peek at her underwear.

“Ah-ha!” laughed Betty, “I knew it!”

“Betty, don’t- EEYAAH!”

A ripping sound echoes across the room as Betty hoisted two fistfuls of pink fabric out of the back of Kat’s skirt, drawing the attention of the other journalists. The Sundies brand boyshorts were hot pink with dark red hearts across them and a dark red waistband. Betty had yanked the fabric up to Kat’s shoulder blades to get a better look, putting the underpants on full display for the camera, causing Kat’s eyes to open wider and wider in discomfort. The onlooking journalists murmured and snickered.

“Oh my God,” whispered Kat as she finally pulled away, “I can’t believe you did that!”

“Viceroy?” laughed Betty, “Yeah, right! I knew you wore Sundies!”

“End the stream!” shouted Kat angrily, face bright red, “End it now!”

“See you next time, everybody!” smiled Betty into the webcam.

The final few seconds of the live stream showed Kat angrily removing her mic equipment and trying to fix the wedgie through her extremely tight pencil skirt, awkwardly squatting and wiggling in vain. Betty laughed and laughed.

**Author's Note:**

> I might not have a sense of style, but I AM picky when it comes to what brand underwear everyone wears


End file.
